Sometimes Being Single Really Sucks


It’s the end of wedding season (Praise the Lord!) Now, don’t get me wrong. I love weddings. I love seeing the union of two people coming together and committing to share their lives with each other. But when you have so many friends all getting married and you find yourself still single without even the potential of a relationship in sight, weddings can kind of be an ugly reminder of how single you are still. This summer alone I knew of at least 15 friends that were getting married. This past year all together I probably had around 35 people I knew tie the knot. That’s a lot. But it’s also one of the many side effects of having gone to a Christian University, everyone gets married. Except for me.

Some of my best friends got married this summer. And while I am genuinely happy for them, it was still hard to go to see them all excited about their new marriage and find their “happily ever after”. I think it’s especially hard right after they get married because my Facebook feed is just full of “Breakfast Date with the Hubs tonight!!!!! ❤ ❤ <3” & “I’m just soooooo blessed to have such an amazing husband” posts, that while they’re all sweet and sentimental, as a single person that reads that, I tend to roll my eyes whenever I read them and my happiness for the new couple dwindles.

It’s hard talking to these friends because all they seem to talk about is their new spouse and how they spent their weekend watching movies on Friday night and I’m just over here like, “I watched The Notebook with my cat…”  It’s hard being single sometimes. It’s hard going at life alone, with no hand to hold, or to have someone that you call on your lunch break just because you’re thinking of them. It’s hard going to bed without a goodnight text.

But even though being single sometimes is hard, I do praise the Lord that I am where I am now, because it is a million times better than where I was, in a crappy relationship with a cheating, lying man who did not love the Lord like he pretends he does. I am free from the roller-coaster ride relationship I was in and I am free to just be me. No restraints of trying to make myself into something that someone would love. I can just be me. I can take a two hour long bike ride to think about life, I can splurge on a pair of gorgeous TOMS shoes and not feel guilty about it. I can spend all morning in my PJs just because I can!

And in my singleness I can prepare myself to be the best person I can be so when I do get in a relationship it’s going to be more amazing than I ever dreamed!

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2 Responses to Sometimes Being Single Really Sucks

  1. zanspence says:

    Enjoyed this article. I like your blog. I too am waiting celibate for marriage for the past 4 years. Well into my mid twenties I was very broken and was codependent. I only had 2 identities: that of the child of my parents or the partner of a mate. I could not fathom myself single or enjoyed time alone or time with my friends. I had a relationship “twist” or saw experiences best enjoyed with a mate. But God healed me of that (among a host of many other things and I”m still healing at deeper levels) gave me a single identity of someone married to Him. God placed marriage in it’s proper scope, that marriage should mimic the spiritual intimacy, commitment and purpose as does the marriage of the believer to Jesus. I take opportunity in my singlehood of sincerely enjoying friends and being a mentor/spiritual mother to younger children. There are some rough spots like what you wrote about but they are few and far between and He has given us so many tools and instructions to stand. And the thought of being out of His will is too much for us to risk. Stand in your conviction. God will use you as a witness to restore how he always intended for us young people to live. Have a nice day!

  2. The Real Answer says:

    who in the world would want to be alone anyway? and it is Very Depressing and Boring when you don’t have a love life like so many Very Blessed Men And Women have. We would want Very Much A Love Life Too.

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